Here we are, back for part 4 in the “Life-Changing Choices Process” that’s going to make 2013 your best year ever.
Last week I left you with a comment to think about, and respond to, which was…
“Choices themselves, even though they’re life-changing… are not good or bad. They’re merely choices. We’re the ones who attach meaning to them and decide whether our choices mean something good or bad”.
We’re starting to dig in pretty deep now and the conversation taking place on the blog right now is getting very intense, which is a great thing because it shows that you’re engaged with this process.
In addition to all the incredible comments you made on the blog, I also got a private email from Calvin, and because it bears so heavily on this conversation, I had to share with you.
Here it is:
Great post (I agree with it)! But instead of barraging you with philosophical musings, I would like to ask you what steps you took to make a good meaning of past choices or regrets? Do you just brainstorm and pick ones that are good and forget the rest?
I’ll take the same example of a life changing choice I posted in your previous blog post: going to college.
– college meant financial debt
– college meant wasting 4 years studying something I wasn’t passionate about
– college meant wasting 4 years and being qualified for the same jobs as students from high school
– college meant gaining independence
– college meant learning to cut down on personal expenses
– college meant living poor so I can appreciate riches and luxury
– college meant learning to cook
– college meant sharpening my reading and writing skills
– college meant sharpening my public speaking skills
– college meant sharpening my interpersonal skills
– college meant stepping out of my comfort zone
– college meant trying new things
Is it as simple as telling yourself to forget the bad and remember the good?
= = =
Here’s my reply:
I LOVE your example. It’s not just remembering the good, but remembering what was not so good as well, and learning from it.
If we learn from it, then it transforms a bad experience into a good, or even a great experience.
= = =
In the simplest of terms, that’s how the “Life-Changing Choices Process” works.
We get to look at the results or consequences that arise from every choice we make, and actively decide how we’re going to respond to them.
We get to decide what meaning we’ll attach to the experience.
And ultimately, we get to decide how that choice will impact our life going forward.
We’re in complete control at all times.
So… as an example I’ll refer back to my DUI story.
When I first shared it on this blog April 5th of last year, it took every bit of courage I could muster in order to candidly talk about it.
I’d never talked openly in public about my DUI and was deathly scared of what people would think of me.
But as soon as I shared my DUI story on the blog, I received a flood of response that completely transformed the entire situation in an instant.
Sure, I learned some valuable lessons from the choice I’d made to drive after drinking, so I’d already transformed that choice on one level.
But sharing my story in this forum, and having it impact so many people in such a big way transformed the experience once again.
Not only did I get to learn from it, but I got to use the experience to impact other people’s lives for the better, and that was HUGE.
It was in that moment that I discovered the “Life-Changing Choices Process” I’m now sharing with you.
It took 15 years from the time I got my DUI to completely transform that choice into a good experience.
But once I’d done so, and understood how to do it, I now had the ability to transform any experience.
The trick lies in doing it as quickly as possible so we can have all the benefits that come from transforming every one of our choices into experiences that will serve us in the way we want.
I’m betting that you’ve already done this in your own life, and that being the case, would love to hear how you did it.
By sharing your comments you’ll be helping all the readers of this blog in a HUGE way, and that alone will transform any choice you’ve made into an incredible experience for you.
So go ahead, share with us because we can’t wait to hear (and learn from) your example of using the “Life-Changing Choices Process”.
Dedicated to your success,
“The Automatic Income Coach”